Foreword to Chapter One

Dryer Sheets on the Dog

and other tales of a modern family

by Camille Capriglione

copyright 2009

                                                     Foreword

When my boyfriend, Robert, and I decided to move in together, we knew that it would be a big change and require some adjustment. We had no idea that it would give us so many laughs!

We were in our thirties. Rob had never been married and I was a single mother. As Rob had been raised by a single mother, he understood what that entailed and knew that my daughter came first. There were nights he witnessed awful mother-daughter brawls. He sat through slamming doors and shouting. He was a darn good sport. Many of our dates were cut short or didn’t happen at all and there was no dating on weeknights. Actually, Robert attended all kinds of school functions with us: sporting events, plays, parent-teacher nights and chorus concerts. For that I was grateful.

He befriended my fifteen-year old and she genuinely liked him in return. She’d show her affection by walking past him and farting with a giggle or pulling off his socks and throwing them behind the television. It was a fine match. So we decided living together would be even more fun.

The biggest difference between us was that I was extremely tidy and Rob was not. Every time I walked into his bachelor pad, I had the urge to run out. Robert had the habit of leaving around whatever he was finished using, whether it was a bowl, a cup or a car part. The item would still be there three weeks later. He insisted that doing this helped him to never to lose anything. 

Another difference between us was that I adored cats and Robert was a dog lover. We were shamelessly attached to our pets and spoiled them accordingly.

 

When I visited his home early in our relationship, his beloved Doberman, Shnoop, was sitting on the couch. Shnoop was chagrined at my presence from the start. He’d had his owner all to himself since he was a pup. On our first date, the dog expressed his feelings by getting a hold of my high-heeled mule and chewing it to pieces. It was ruined. Robert apologized profusely. I put on my shoe, hopped out of the house and gave the dog a sardonic grin. Perhaps it was a premonition of things to come …                                  

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